Tuesday 3 April 2012

Potty Training on the Home Stretch // Early Toileting

After recording the beginning of the process (or should I say mid-way through the process as we did start on the potty around 6 months), I kinda forgot to track the progress! So in the interest of posterity, here tis' the current state of play around here...



Enjoying the breeze!


Welllll, I think we can pretty much call this little dude 'done'!! Eli has done soooo great. Well, since we got serious about going nappy/diaper-free at home at the end of January, he has been chugging along really well. Due to the general busy-ness of life, initially he sometimes only got an hour or so nappy free time in a day (yes, I am forgetful!) but pretty much every day for increasing lengths of time he had some nappy-free time. There were a lot of 'hits' and quite a few 'misses' too, of course. Lots of cheers, and a few muffled sighs. The misses were all part of the learning process (raising awareness) and to be expected, though I sure was glad our living area is non-carpeted now which made clean up so much easier! He was still always going at the usual times he always sat on the potty but the key was getting him to learn to go to the potty (say he needed to) when he had to go at other times during the day.


Um... do you mind??

I knew we were getting close when he ran through the house one day carrying an (empty!) potty to me shouting 'Weeee! Weee!', so I helped sit him down, he went.... victory! About four weeks ago (so about a month into the process), the Little Dude got really serious. All of a sudden he could go 'on cue' (as in you sit him down and he *tries* to go - and almost always does!) - this was key to being able to do purposeful potty trips before outings and so on. His little concentrating face is hilarious to behold! He now always asks to go potty when he does feel the need to go too - for both #1 and #2 and even if he is wearing a nappy at the time. We are also doing most outings nappy-free... and accident-free too! (so far...phew) Way to go, E!!

Misses are rare these days and usually because we both get very distracted. Most of the time though, he lets me know when he needs to go. Of course he has been enjoying the attention too, usually leaping from the potty to shout 'GOOD JOB!!! GOOD JOB!!!!!' and jump up and down with his little arms in the air cheering.... following quickly by "CHEAT!!! CHEAT!!' which actually translates to him saying 'TREAT!!! TREAT!!!' (Phew, my son is not a deceptive potty-trainer, what a relief). Half a chocolate button for his efforts. The treats were only recently introduced to keep his enthusiasm for the project going to completion and suffice to say - gladly received!




To bullet point my approach for anyone vaguely interested, I would say the keys are -
  • Start potty time early and regularly - after meals, naps etc - keep it positive, fun, read books etc. We started at six months and it became an easy part of our routine. Positive potty routine from early on meant when we wanted to get rid of the nappies it seemed a natural extension of something he was already very familiar with.
  • Start going nappy-free around the house around 18months or when you think they can signal they need to go. We used sign language as well as word cues.
  • Focus on staying clean and dry, not just on producing in the potty. Remember the true goal!
  • I found my main work was done once they can both tell you when they need to go AND they can go on cue - eg you put them on the potty at any time and you can tell they are consciously trying to 'release'. This saves a lot of rushing around!!
  • A fantastic book I read when Eli was young which I learnt heaps from (and was also pleased to find I had instinctively done a lot of with Lily) was the book Diaper Free Before Three - turns a lot of the common potty training guidelines upside down! Very interesting and links well with Elimination Communication stuff too, though I wasn't committed enough to do that full on with Eli!

It has been interesting for me to note that he is pretty much exactly on par with his sister - although she was showing signs of readiness at 16months, I was very sick being pregnant with Eli so delayed getting started till 18months and she was done by 19/20months. Now with Eli, though I did a sorta light version of Elimination Communication with him since about six months old, he is pretty much on the same track as her - got serious about 18months, done by 20 months. By 'done', I mean reliably diaper/nappy-free during the day, including for outings. I always heard boys generally trained later and longer, so maybe the EC balanced out those factors? Or maybe that's just the age I got serious both times around? Who really knows, but here we are anyway!!

All in all, it's been a fun (yes, really!) and relatively smooth process. A bit of work, yes, but not a lot of stress at all. It's not a three-day method or anything (as I prefer to transition slowly as I find it just makes it more seamless and practical), but for us, it works great - I enjoy training before two as I find it captures them before it becomes a power struggle and capitalises on what I feel are their natural abilities. It is amazing to see how capable and in-tune these little people can be with their own bodies. And of course, ever so proud of themselves too!

I am happy to be on the other side of the proverbial Potty Training hill for now... the current state being Eli rockin' his Big Boy undies all day every day including most outings (except for sleep times, will leave that for a bit older). Still gotta pay pretty close attention for a while but every day he gets more focused, more confident, able to hold for longer, etc. The kid knows he is a Big Boy now, and gee is he ever so pleased with himself - and we are too, little Buddy!!! Keep on rockin' those cute little undies!


Giving himself a few cheers!





13 comments:

  1. Well done Eli and a HUGE well done to you and Mark. I am in awe of how dedicated you are to this approach. I really should get cracking with harper as she has been showing quite a few signs this month. I will be taking all your tips on board. Thank you!
    You are a wealth of knowledge dear Kate :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. aw amber, thanks hon!! Dont feel like we deserve much credit as to me its just been the most natural way that felt right/easiest for us (trying to follow their cues) and tho a bit more intense now... saves lots of nappy changes and washes from here on out (yippee!!). All the best w harper, im sure she will do great. I love our little info-sharing circle we have, so blessed by your knowledge and passions too xx

      Delete
  2. Fantastic Post! Wow you are great at this parenting thing :) My eldest boy was day trained entirely by 2 and night trained by 2and 1/2. My 2nd is mostly day trained, He has just turned 2 Even stays dry for daytime sleeps. I love reading your blog, make me fell like I am doing okay with my 3 ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. wow your sweet comment really made me smile - firstly for an old pro (3 kids!!!) like you to say im doing well and secondly bc it makes me so happy to think my lil old blog could be encouraging to other amazing parents....you are doing SO super great with your 3 beautiful boys!! Sounds like they and you did awesome on the PT too - nice to move past it huh! I am cheering at the lack of nappies to wash!!

      Delete
  3. Well Done Eli! That is fantastic and kudos to you Kate for being such a great teacher! I bought B some little boy undies on sale about amonth ago, they are ridiculously cute! Can't wait to see him wear them :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thanks andrea!! and yep - little boy undies are the CUTEST!!!!!! argh, that little bottom!! Blake will be rocking them in style im sure too!

      Delete
  4. Wow Kate - sounds like Eli's doing an awesome job! Must be so exciting when you see them 'get' it! More food for thought for me as my little guy gets bigger.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh Kate, your posts just crack me up...that second photo/caption is H.I.L.A.R.I.O.U.S! On a serious note, I am impressed with your strategies - I always thought toilet training was something to do after they turned two, however, will be keen to get my baby girl (almost 18 months) started ASAP. Figure she will be keen as she's got two role models in her older siblings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. heehee thanks!! :) Ooh 18m is a GREAT age to start - if you are keen that is! Just grab a potty and start sitting her on it after meals, read books etc. Nappy free time is great if you are willing. I bet she will surprise you! let me know how you go! x

      Delete
  6. Kate, Thanks so much for sharing! My daughter is 15mo and I'm starting to read up on potty training and the more I read, the more I'm convinced that I want to start early. I'm not sure if you read posted comments on blogs this old, but if you do, I'd love some practical advice. Please know that I'm simply curious as to how to make this work:) 1. Did you start wearing training pants(I plan to use cloth ones) just for a few hours a day? All day? What about naps? Going to the grocery store? Play dates? 2. She's showing no interest in taking off her clothes; will this make training harder? 3. My mom would say that I would be training myself, not training her. Do your children start with the knowledge they need to go, or is it learned during the two months it took you (I think you mentioned that at 20 mo, they were initiating going to the bathroom) 3. Are there signs that we need to bring the diapers back out and try later? This is a lot, but if you have the time, I'd love to know what you think!
    Jessie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. hi Jessie! Thanks for reading and commenting and I think 15m is a great time to get started! I highly recommend the book 'diaper free before three' if you want some more reading on the topic but happy to answer any questions! so here are my responses just from what we did...
      1) i just went straight to regular underwear when we were ready to get serious about training at about 18m. before that he wore nappies but went to potty regularly (before naps and bedtime etc). At 18m we would simply put him in 'big boy underwear' when at home - still used diapers/nappies for sleeps and also for outings till i was pretty confident in his abilities like around 19/20m.
      2) dont worry about the clothes thing, encourage but dont force - they will need soem help for a while but will pick it up in time. wearing just underwear at home will help make it easier/quicker for them to learn!
      3) yes in some ways its about making it a habit for them first which they then learn to recognise and initiate but it still gets the job done a lot quicker (in my experience) than waiting for them. W eli we started him on the potty at 6months! my daughter she showed awareness at 18m so thats when we got started. but i think the more habit/awareness you bring to going, the sooner they pick it up for themselves.
      4) i think i would stop/bring back diapers till a later time if they were resisting going/turning it into a power struggle or something like that. in that case i would probably just go back to diapers and try again later. BUT the plus of starting before 2yrs old is that you usually avoid the 'power struggle' of potty training that usually comes later - so keep it regular, positive, low-pressure and just by making it part of their day u might be amazed how quickly she picks it up! At 15 m i woudl probably just introduce the potty/reading time on the potty a few times a day (like after meals, before sleeps, before bath) and get her used to it, then move to diaper-free time around 18m or so...hope that helps, let me know if you have more questions! xx

      Delete
    2. Thank you so much for the quick reply! I have the book on hold at the library and I'm excited to read it. Do you think it makes a difference if we just use a potty seat on the toilet?

      Delete
    3. hi Jessie - no worries :) I always did a combo so they would be able to use either/both - that said, the potty is something they will probably be able to use independently a bit sooner/safer than climbing up to toilet, so we mostly used that early on.

      Delete

i love to hear your thoughts, thanks for leaving your comments! xx