the dark days are over...

Yes, yes, Florence and the Machine, I know it's actually 'The Dog Days are Over', but let's be honest, most of the world thinks the lyric is actually 'the dark days', which makes a whole lot more sense, so let's just change it and move on shall we?!

Now, where was I?

Oh yes... I'm calling it. I am..... 'better'. I am hereby declaring myself through the worst of this pregnancy sickness. Yes, I still only have the stamina of a 19th century convalescent who must take to a chair every ten minutes to catch her breath, and yes I am still sometimes nauseus (when I overdo it) and vomiting every now and then, but... I am pretty much - much better. Yippee!

I am so ready. For over four months of this pregnancy sickness, I have been hibernating through the winter and now glorious spring is here and I am ready, bursting, itching to get out there and run (or at least stroll) around in the sunshine with my beautiful family. I could not be more ready!!!

My mission for this week: Take the kid's to Dance Class.
Last time I tried did not go so well! But... today I did it! I was totally wrecked
afterwards but I'm so glad I did it - another milestone in getting back
into life with my kids!

Trying out a more serious look...

Everyone must be so sick of hearing about how sick I have been. I know **I** am sick of being sick, that is for sure. It has been a tough phase - not just physically but emotionally. Seeing the toll on my wonderful husband, my children. Feeling so wretched and so useless. Battling the depression that so often accompanies hyperemesis. There have been dark days and many tears. I was so grateful for the bizarre and beautiful coincidence of two amazing girls who live in my street who also suffered from hyperemesis (one to the point of needing a feeding tube, wow, glad I avoided that experience!)... they pinpointed the depression risk which helped me watch out for it so it did not overcome. Of course, hand in hand with that comes guilt that I should ever be down when I am so very, very blessed and grateful to be pregnant. I truly am, and I never forgot that - and though this phase took our family to the brink, it was all worth it for this little baby who is currently kicking and wriggling inside me. I am also so grateful for those who encouraged, blessed, and checked in on me, I think without those connections, I would have struggled even more. God was truly my ever present comforter and solace through the hardest moments.

This experience makes me more aware of those suffering from serious and chronic illness - to suffer so long and without the joyful cause (and end date) that I was privileged to have, must be so tough. My heart goes out to those who are enduring such hardships - if I struggled with such a relatively short term thing, how hard it must be for those for who it goes on and on? I cannot imagine, and I pray I can be more aware and more helpful and supportive to those suffering in the future.

Always laughing together with their secret sibling business!

I don't even know what to say about this pic, it's too funny!
Lily has on her best 'comforting mama' face and Eli looks ready to be done!

Anyway, I am here. Ready to get back into my life!! I have so many things I am excited to do, people I am dying to see, activities I want to do with my children, places I can't wait to go. Yes, I will have to pace myself, but I feel like I am just emerging from a fog and in a way feel refreshed to be able to participate in regular life again - yes, maybe even cooking dinner!! (I'm sure that enthusiasm will quickly wane, haha).

I won't ramble on but I must finish off with one more final thank you to tail-end the one I started here. So many more people have supported our family through compassionate, kind and loving gestures. They meant the world to me, to my family and we will not forget it! A heart-felt thank you to all of you (you know who you are!) who helped us survive this testing time. I am so thankful for my family, my friends, my church, my community for caring for me and for my family. You guys rock! And of course a big shout out to my darling husband who has carried the bulk of the load, single parenting for months and working so hard to keep this household functioning - love you, honey!

And now, with 18 weeks or so left of this pregnancy, I look forward to preparing for this little one's arrival, and getting out in the sunshine and soaking up many sweet moments with my family and friends... bring it on!